Chapter 6

Nicki sat nervously at the white clothed table with silverware, glasses, flowers and plates on it in a decorative way. She sat down as the host had told her to do when she arrived there. She was the only one in the building and wanted to leave, but she had promised she'd meet him here. She looked down at the simple black curve fitting dress with a gold belt over the waist and her gold heels and became self conscious. What if this doesn't work out for us? I mean divorce papers don't have shit to do with feelings and love, if it's there. I shouldn't have agreed to this. I thought I would love having him around, but it's different now. He is a divorced man and I'm just his baby mother. She sighed as two minutes of sitting there turned into five minutes. Ugh, I'm ready to fucking go. She stood up to leave when he came in the room with a tux on. He smiled upon seeing her and pulled her into a tight hug. She let out the breath she was holding and stepped back taking in his appearance. His tux was all black, white dress shirt and a fake gold flower pinned to the jacket.

"You look nice."

"I tried, LJ pick this out, but you look gorgeous."

"I know, Zuri told me when I tried it on."

"Can I hold you?"

"No.. Lets talk first."

He pulled her chair out and watched as she sat down. He grabbed at a few pins that were stuck in her hair to keep it up and let her hair fall to the middle of her back. She feathered it with her fingers then watched him sit down across from her. Damn, she looks beautiful like this. He stared at her as she looked over the menu and folded her lips every so often. Her dimples coming and going. What if tonight is my last chance to make shit right? I need Onika in my life. Hope this night goes right and I can get Nic to move to Cali with me. He looked down at the menu then back up to her looking at him.

"Faree, where's the waiter or waitress, I'm hungry dammit."

"Calm down, why you so hungry?"

"I haven't eaten all day and I'm nervous."

"Sure, you not..."

"If I was, it ain't yours..."

"You still trying with Lamar?"

"Safaree, don't..."

"Yes or No, Onika?"

"No, why in the fuck would I do that? I moved half your shit in my house and you ask...."

"I don't want to fight tonight, alright?"

She huffed sitting back in her chair, crossing her legs and putting her arms across her chest. He asked a dumb ass question, but don't want to argue? Don't ask stupid ass questions. He smirked sliding his chair next to her's and placed his hand in her lap and rubbed her thigh. Now he want to fucking play. She pushed his hand off her lap and scooted away from him.

"Come here girl."

He pulled her onto his lap and pulled her against his chest. She sat with her back against his chest as the waitress came in. It would be a bitch. She sat up and popped her back. He groaned before he could stop himself. Nicki looked at him and shook her head. Horny ass.

"I want a Long Island Ice Tea and he'll have a Pepsi."

"You sure..."

"Yes, he is."

Nicki side eyed the girl as she tried to make eye contact with him. I'll kick this hoe's ass tonight. He play too much, did this shit on purpose. She snapped her fingers in his face as she turned to look at him. He nodded and went back to rubbing over her hips and ass.

"Alright, sir, I'll be back with your drinks."

Nicki waited until she disappeared and got up and got back in her seat. He looked over her and grabbed her legs. Damn, I can't keep my hands off her. He leaned forward and kissed her thigh then licked the inner part.

"Stop, I know this isn't why you invited me here cause if you just want a fuck... You could of just called Karen."

"Man, what the fuck? You just so damn... God."

"I'm what? Huh! Just a fuck? A nut? Cause I mean that's the only time you want me around."

"You know that's not damn true! I been wanting to be with you since high school. You the one was around fucking random niggas at school and shit."

"What the hell are you talking about Safaree?"

"Jeremy, Rod and Vince? Ring a bell or you got amnesia?"

"You're still mad about high school shit, so you treat me like a fuck because of it?"

"That's not.."

"Yeah it is, but okay."

The room was suffocated with an angry silence. He stood up and put his chair back across from her and sat down. He leaned on the table with his leg shaking and face frowned up. She always bitching about what's going on, but she act like she don't want it as bad as I do. Shit, I got more love for her than anything and I want this shit to work out. She steady be trying to down play my love for her.

"Here you guys go, what are you guys eating?"

"Can I get the chicken wing platter and a shrimp bowl?"

"Sauce? Side?"

"Hot and Lemon pepper mixed and fries."

"Okay, and you sir?"

"Lobster pizza and a bowl of your special gumbo. Hold that bread, give me a side of Mac&Cheese and green beans."

"Okay. I'll be back."

"I didn't fuck all of them."

"What?"

"Jeremy, Rod and Vince."

"You didn't?"

"I didn't."

"Then why..?"

"I don't know what you heard, but since you've been angry about this let me tell you."

"Alright."

"Jeremy and I never fucked first of all, Rod and I never fucked, but..."

"My home boy, Nic, for real?"

"I was dating him, what I was suppose to save myself for you? You were dating Karen not giving a damn about me, but every time you heard some shit then here you was."

"You didn't show..."

"So that night at my house when you introduced Karen or better yet that night at ol' boy's house when I poured my heart out..."

"You were drunk!"

"Yeah, use that excuse to feel like you didn't know!"

"I didn't!"

"Wow, okay."

She got up and went in her purse and pulled out a fifty. She threw it on the table and stormed out. He ignored my fucking feelings for over ten years and now want to sit here and act brand new. He ran behind her and grabbed her before she left the building.

"You can't keep running away, Nicki."

"You're one to fucking talk, Safaree!"

She snatched away from him and continued out the door. He grabbed her again and held tight to her. She stared into his dark brown eyes as he stared into her face.

"Look, I didn't invite you here to argue about the past. As of tonight, I'm over it. All I know is that, Nic, if I let you leave then I'll be waiting another five years to call you mine and I can't do that. For our kids, shit, for us can we work this out? I just need to know if you're ready for us? If you need time or what? I promise I'm not leaving this time, I'm done with the games, ready to settle down with you and be a father."

He looked at her face now wet with tears. She looked down as he let her go. It started to drizzle as they stood in the middle of the parking lot. She pulled out her phone and walked to her car. He followed behind her as his heart sank.

"So that's it? You not..."

"I'm going home, are you coming?"

"That's all you.."

"Are you coming or not? Or you backing out now?"

She stated getting in her car and starting it. He raced around to his car and followed behind her to a condo. She let the garage up and pulled in and watched him pull up next to her. She got out and waited for him by the door.

"When did you get this?"

"I been had it."

"You pay for this?"

"You can say that.. Here."

She handed him a set of keys and walked into the house. She pulled off the dress and stood in front of him with just a thong on.

"Do you love me?"

"Yeah..."

He gulped looking at her perky breast. She grabbed his chin and stared into his eyes. He stared back as she grabbed his jacket and pulled it off him. She pulled it on and smiled as it swallowed her body.

"I'm ready for you to come home, but I want to make sure you're going to stay for more than four months then leave. You promised me, but it's not only me that needs that reassurance of your presence. If it isn't for us that you stay at least be here for the kids."

He pulled her close and kissed her neck as he rubbed her ass. She giggled as their tummies growled at the same time.

"I'll cook."

"Or just order take out."

"No, my baby needs a meal because I know that bitch, Karen, couldn't get down like me in the kitchen."

"Or the bedroom.."

He mumbled. Nicki smirked hearing what he said. She walked to the bedroom and put on a T shirt. SB walked around the house looking around. She walked into the kitchen and began cooking.

******

"Mommy, where are your clothes?"

"What?"

"Mommy, you're naked!"

"Zuri, move."

"Get up! Daddy made breakfast."

Nicki sat up realizing that the kids were home. She groaned feeling the pain between her legs. He didn't have to fuck so hard just cause I asked him to. She pulled Zuri onto the bed and grabbed her T shirt and pulled it on. Zuri straddled her lap and smiled looking like Safaree. Now I get to see him twice. Nicki pecked her lips and pushed her back.

"Mommy, you have a red and purple mark on your neck."

"Gah, tell Daddy to come here."

"Did he pinch your neck? That's what happen to Sidney when Billy pinched her arm."

"No baby just go get him."

"Alrighty then. I'll just ask him."

Nicki laughed as she left the room. She got out of bed and pulled on some boy shorts. She stretched and squat to decrease the pain. He walked in the room and held up her phone. She looked confused as his face screwed up.

"What?"

"Lamar called."

"Okay.."

"After he texted this morning saying he miss you too."

"I haven't..."

"After I moved in? Really Nic?"

"Wait, you didn't even look to see what we talked about you're jumping to.."

"I read it and funny how he thinks you guys are getting back together."

"I never said that. He is my friend and I do miss him."

"Friend?"

"Stop yelling at me and calm down. His daughter died and we just talked about how she was and that's when I told him I missed him and her. Did you see that or are you just reading what he said?"

His face soften then he handed her the phone. She grabbed his hand and pulled him into a hug.

"Good Morning, Big Daddy."

"Good Morning, Sexy."

"Why didn't you tell me the kids got here?"

"Surprise. I wasn't expecting Zay'more to come back here and wake you."

"Well she did and I'm sore."

"I told you, but you the one... Oh Daddy faster faster, don't slow down harder."

She laughed at him mocking her and making faces that she supposedly makes. I dislike him, so much. He grinned then pecked her lips. He smiled and pulled her to the kitchen. LJ walked up to her and hugged her.

"Hey Mommy's Man."

"Wassup Ma?"

"Ew, so you acting brand new?"

"No. I'm just cooler than you."

"Nigga, bye."

He grinned as she sat on the chair next to him with her feet up on the table. SB came by and pushed them on floor and sat a plate in front of her. They made eye contact before he called Zuri to eat. She sped into the room and sat down. LJ said the blessing then they ate in an awkward silence until SB spoke up.

"LJ, Zuri... I know yawl were looking forward to the London trip, but Karen got really sick."

"Good, I didn't feel like going anyways."

"Lame, be quiet."

"Jerk!"

"Nerd."

"Asshole."

Nicki jumped as she watched and listened to the sound of SB's hand smacking Zuri in the mouth. Zuri looked at her as she held her mouth and cried. LJ sat in shock and just looked down at his food.

"Amora' after I finish saying what I have to say go take a nap and get yourself together. You won't disrespect your mother and you damn sure not going to disrespect me."

"How is..."

"Zay'more, baby."

"He hit me. Mommy?"

Nicki wanted to comfort her, but she knew if they were to learn and to respect him, she had to keep her emotions in check. She looked at Zuri and grabbed her hand, pulling her hand away to see her lip. SB stared at her and sat back watching her. It's not swollen or anything. She kissed her lip and whispered in her.

"It's okay baby."

"No it's not, Mommy."

Zuri got up and stormed out the room. Nicki looked at SB then down at her food feeling bad. She's going to hate me.

"LJ, go get ready for the day."

"Alright, Big Guy."

He got up and left the table. He went into Nic's bedroom then went back to his room walking pass them as they sat in silence. Nicki ate as she looked up to see him staring at her. She smirked with a mouth full of food then continued to chew.

"Why you do that?"

"Do what?"

"Comfort her after I disciplined her."

"That's my baby..."

"She's my baby too, but the cursing has to stop. You wanted me to fix it..."

"I know, but you didn't have to hit her in the mouth, don't be a mean Daddy.."

Nicki pouted. He shook his head and smirked. She always want it fixed, but don't like the way I do it. He stood up and grabbed the kids plates. Nicki groaned then stood up and walked in the kitchen behind him.

"Okay, I'll let you do it your way, but don't hurt my babies."

"Why would I hurt my own kids? Don't play me."

"Didn't say you would just warning you."

He laughed as she stood on her toes and reached for a cup. She leaned to one side then to the other side trying to get the cup. He pushed her arms down and grabbed the cup.

"You should of just asked and seeing that you don't have a stool in here, who helps you any other time?"

He quizzed handing her the cup, but keeping a hold to it. She looked away then backed up trying to get the cup out of his hand. He looked at her hard waiting for an answer.

"This is.... Lamar and I's...."

"So he's paying for this?"

"Just until the lease is up."

He pushed the cup in her hand and grabbed at a few things that were his as he made his way to the bedroom. She out her fucking mind? Got me in their fucking love shack and fucking me here. He mumbled to himself as he grabbed his pants. Nicki walked into the room and grabbed his arm only for him to snatch away from her. She yelled out at him.

"Faree! Listen.. Baby."

"What the fuck is there to hear?"

"I pay for this place too! And we barely came here together! Stop, packing please."

"Naw, but you guys were here, you fucked me in this bed after..."

She walked out the room now not giving a damn if he left or stayed. She grabbed a towel and bath towel out of the closet. He grabbed a bag from out the closet and put his shirt and pants in it. Let me get the fuck out this place.

******

SB stood outside the door of Nicki's home and pleaded for her to open the door. She stood behind the door and unlocked it after letting him stand outside for a good thirty minutes. He rushed in, dropping to his knees and kissing her stomach.

"Move Safaree.. I'm still mad at you."

"Where are the kids?"

"At the new house with Nancy."

"Oh, Nicki I'm sorry..."

"I hear you every time you come back. You left again when.."

"It's only a couple hours."

"Next time it will be a couple days. I'm not promising our kids you'll be here when every time you get mad you're ready to leave."

"I needed some space...."

"Maybe this isn't the time for US.. To be serious. Just make sure you're around for the kids."

"Nic, don't baby.."

"Safaree, please you aren't ready."

"I am.."

"..but you aren't and you showed that today."

"When my girl tells me that we..."

"First all, I wouldn't even disrespect you in that way and this is a brand new bed because I was taking you there anyways, second of all you didn't even listen to me before you ran yo ass out the door.. I'm done arguing with you about you running away if you want to leave, bye."

He stood against the wall in her bedroom as she moved about packing Zuri's clothes and shoes neatly with hers. He pushed off the wall and walked behind her. He trailed his hand up her arm and they intertwined fingers as she leaned into him. He put his chin on her head and sighed.

"I won't leave for an extended time. I just need some space to think."

"If you listen to me before blowing up then you wouldn't need space to think."

"True, but I know if we aren't together you'll just bring a new nigga in and I'm not letting that happen."

"Um huh, well act right.. I'm not putting up with your run away act anymore."

"And I don't want you talking to Lamar anymore."

She stepped away and turned to face him. He stared back at her as he read her face. He let go of her hands and shook his head before she answered him.

"I'm not sure I can do that right now."

"Wow."

"He needs a friend... Karen needed you.."

"Nic, she's my ex wife! You was just dating this nigga!"

"So because I didn't have a ring, our relationship wasn't as serious as yours? Alright."

She shook her head reading into what he said literally. Stupid Ass, so I guess what we're doing now isn't serious to him until he puts a ring on my finger. She angrily packed the last of Zuri's toys into a tote. She stepped around him and grabbed her keys and headed out the door.

"You just gone stand there or what?"

"You know..."

"I have to be to work in an hour lets go."

******

Lauren passed Nicki a drink as they sat in the VIP of the club watching people walk pass. Nicki was on her third drink, so Lauren decided not to drink.

"Nic, girl what's up?"

"Shit, everything, except my relationship."

"What's going on?"

"His jealousy. He had the nerve to ask me why I don't answer my work phone, he checked my phone history online and blocked client numbers."

"Wait, Safaree?"

"Yes! Stressing me out! That's why I had you take all my male clients. I don't know what his problem..."

She looked down to see him calling. Ugh, please no petty shit. She showed Lauren the phone before answering to loud noise in the background.

"Open the door. Who you with?"

"What?"

They heard a bang at the door and Nic sighed loudly now realizing he was at the club. He can't be serious. Lauren opened the door as SB bum rushed pass her and looked around. He slid in the booth next to Nicki and became upset with the outfit she had on.

"Yo what I tell you about these dresses?"

"I'm out with a friend."

"So now you trying to impress a bitch?"

"What?!"

"Lets go.. You're going home."

He grabbed her arm and pulled her out the booth. Nicki stumbled as she grabbed her drink and drunk it down. SB turned to her and knocked it out her hand. She giggled as he carried her out the club.

"Safaree put me down."

"Shut up, Nic."

"No! Put me down!"

He pressed her body up against a car and stared in her face. She diverted her eyes as she squirmed to get out of his grip. He squeezed tighter as she put up less and less of a fight.

"Please Faree you're hurting me."

"And Karen, you don't think what you're doing is hurting me?"

Nicki's eyes filled with tears as he called her the wrong name. He let her go then pulled on his fitted cap and groaned loudly. Nicki stood up straight and fixed herself. She looked at him and got in her car. Treating me like I'm that hoe. She looked at his hand prints on her arms and sat in the parking lot crying. I'm so in love with him, but I can't do this right now. She waited for Lauren outside the club then got dropped off at home.

When she got home there was a bouquet of flowers and a card.

"Nicki I miss you and I need you."

Her heart dropped reading his name. She walked into the house and sighed at the kids laying on the sofa sleeping. She kissed their foreheads and made her way up the stairs slowly.